My Favorite Night of the Year....

It's here... My favorite night of the year. The Oscars. MY Superbowl. All day my phone has been blowing up....texts, emails, calls... asking me how excited I was about the night. They knew, I LIVE for this night. And I haven't missed an Oscar night since the early 80's. I've been there for every big win, speech, every uncomfortable moment on the Red Carpet (Billy Bush), every uncomfortable moment on stage, every political push, the hosts (Billy Crystal, Whoopi, Jon Stewart, Ellen Degeneres). So let's see....Vino....CHECK. Food spread...CHECK. Let's go to the Movies....

I really don't think I've ever received more texts in a 3-hour span. Best dressed, worst dressed, who looks good, who has bad hair, who was awkward, who's bow was too big on their dress, who's speech was too long, who's speech got cut off, how great the performances were, how awful the performances were. Everyone truly has a different opinion. I almost got in fights with friends. Ah the Oscars, bringing us all closer. Well, here's where I was coming from...

Starting off the show with a Zac Efron appearance?? PERFECT. What a beautiful kid (I have a creepy little crush on him). Yes, his hair was a little crazy, but he could have a mohawk and I wouldn't care. Such a nice charming unaffected kid and Hollywood needs to embrace that. Too many douchebags out there in young Hollywood, so Team Zac all the way. I'm sure people were wondering why he was even there, obviously the Oscar's attemp to get young viewers to watch by inviting young Hollywood to the show (Twilight's Kristen Stewart, Taylor Lautner, Amanda Seyfried, Miley Cyrus). They looked like semi-impostors at the show. Did they even know who Lauren Bacall was?!?

This is Miley's second year at the Oscars, and didn't look thrilled to be there. And instead of looking 17, she looked about 37. Too old and way too freaking tan. Someone forgot to pay attention to the timer in the tanning booth. And the posture? Stand up straight girlfriend, you are on the red carpet at the biggest night in Hollywood. Don't slump over. Not a huge fan of the corset dress either. I'm sorry, who decided this was a good look? It's never a look that looks classy, looks pretty damn whorish to me. I'm not sure who decided adding a long shimmery train to a lingerie top is classy. But most of all, Miley need to lose her tatted up mother. This lady... looks like she's having a mid-life crisis. So okay, you're 17 and you need a guardian with you at this event.. Bring your cool dad. Leave Montana momma with the gigantic wing tattoos on her back at home. This could be a top 10 moment when your mother embarrasses you. I'm all about Team Miley, but this was not her best showing.

Also not happy to be there was Ms. Kristen Stewart. This girl... Could she be less interested in being famous? My god, why is she so freaking thankless? "Poor me, I'm in the movies, people recognize me, people want my picture, people want my autograph, I make millions of dollars, I make out with Robert Pattinson". Honestly, she's horrible. Looked edgy pretty, but holy teen angst. Smile Kristen, it's not all that bad. She's kind of the devil. I swear, one movie with Jodie Foster ("Panic Room" where she looks like she's a boy) and she's too cool for everyone.

The Red Carpet Crew

I will never ever say a bad thing about Ryan Seacrest. He is the man, he is one of my favorite people in Hollywood. Idol will go downhill after Simon leaves? Hell no. That is only happening if Searcrest walks. People love him and he always asks the right questions, he prepares (take a note Billy Bush), I love a Seacrest Red Carpet. And then there are Seacrest's E! cohorts, Giuliana Rancic & Jay Manuel. Who's worse?! Jay and I are never on the same page (Really Jay? J. Lo is best dressed?!), meanwhile what is he wearing!? And Giuliana is cute on her reality show with hubby Bill, but she is a little awkward at these events and I think I have the same earrings from Kohls. Someone decided to put them up in the rafters too with no real access to the carpet. Interesting...

Usually every year I have one or two moments when I have to bury my head in a pillow or turn the television on mute because I'm so mortified at some of the questions asked of the nominees. It was smooth sailing for an hour or 2... and then it happened: I moved over to ABC at 7.

Someone gave Kathy Ireland a cheap 80's dress and jewelry and handed her a mic. I'm sorry... what? who? There is a REASON she modeled and never did any acting or had a broadcasting career (Sorry people, the flick "Unnecessary Roughness" with the Quantum Leap guy does not count). She was god-awful. This is hands down the most uncomfortable I've ever been on a red carpet. I can't believe it, she one-upped Billy Bush (Remember when he climbed over Alec Baldwin to ask another actor a question? Excruciating). Why is she talking so loud and awkward? Who made this decision? Is she drunk? High? Yes, she is still hot for 46 years old, no doubt. But since when is she relevant? Zac Efron wasn't even born when she was on the cover of SI and was probably thinking "who the hell is this woman interviewing me and why is she yelling in my ear?". Miley looked creeped out too. I am not exagerrating when I say every time she spoke I had to put my fingers in my ears like a little kid does to her mother, "I'm not listening, I'm not listening"... Worst red carpet interviewer ever.

Best Dressed Male

Sam Worthington, Jeremy Renner, Ryan Reynolds, Matt Damon, Zac Efron, Clooney (who always makes the list) rocking a semi-Taylor Hicks-esque mop. Many beautiful men on the carpet.. it's hard to pick who was best. Can't even think of a worst-dressed man. I can't changed my mind - Quentin Tarantino.

Best Dressed Female

Sandra Bullock looked statuesque in cold and her fiery red lips. Love love loved it. She looked like she already won. She might be the coolest girl in Hollywood, or as Seacrest calls her "A chick who is kind of like a dude".

Penelope Cruz looked stunning, despite the fact that she already won last year (nominated again this year for "Nine"). Now, most winners from the previous year return in just all black with messy hair. Like they don't need to try anymore. It happens every year (Remember Gwyneth Paltrow's f*cked up braid and see through black Alexander McQueen dress she wore the year after she won for "Shakespeare in Love"?) Julia Roberts did the same thing after her win for "Erin Brockovich". But not Penelope, she looked amazing.

Maggie Gyllenhall....Finally someone who mixes it up with color and style. And could she and her husband, Peter Saarsgard, be more adorable together? Mags is a tough person though, takes herself so seriously. Here's my problem though with this one though. I seriously think she grew up in a naked house. I'm pretty sure she doesn't say yes to a script unless she sees a nude scene. Let's count them.. Secretary, Strip Search, Sherrybaby, Crazy heart.

Cameron Diaz...Could be my number one overall. Usually, Cam takes chances on the carpet, but I thought she rocked the old Hollywood glamour. She was so incredibly pretty and sparkly.

Kate Winslet rocking a semi-bridesmaid look, but Kate Winslet is in my Jenny Aniston category. I will never say a bad word about her. She looked stunning.

Faith Hill....There to support hubby Tim McGraw for "The Blind Side", Faith always looks fantastic. Simple black with lace. Stunning.

Rachel McAdams...Could she more adorable? This one is really starting to become America's girl crush (I think I got several texts from friends saying how much they loved her). She looks pretty any way.. she looked pretty as a blonde, I like her as a brunette, my friend likes her as a red head. The hair, the earrings, the dress... she looked amazing.

Meryl Streep.. a classic beauty with the best sense of humor. I hope I look like a hottie like her at age 60. And for the Project Runway fans out there, her dress was designed by finalist Chris March.

Worst Dressed Female

Charlize Theron... a woman who always gets it right, who I think is the most beautiful woman in the WORLD CHOSE to leave her house with rosettes on her boobies. This was a conscious decision. She therefore she has to be on the top of this list. How could she look in the mirror and say to herself "wow, I look fantastic, I'll be on the best dressed list for sure". God awful. Another example of a former Oscar best actress winner who thinks she can wear whatever she wants. Just terrible.

Zoe Saldana... This dress was a-f*cking-trocious. My reaction to this dress? I saw the sparkly top through the crowd, "Oh she looks kind of pretty. (Then the camera panned down...) Oh. Oh god. Oh good lord. Oh what the hell is that? Pink? Ew. Purple too? Ew. Are you kidding me? Ew." I did not like it.

Diane Kruger... This woman....The hair, the dress, not her best. She's hot, she's cold.. She's like the freaking Oprah Winfrey of red carpet fashion ("She's fat, she's thin, she's fat, she's thin"). Pick a style and go with it. Best dressed, worst dressed, best dressed, worst dressed... she's so confusing. I love that she's a fashion risk taker, but this was not her best look after she stunned at SAG.. and after that horrible cotton candy pink crap she wore to the Golden Globes.

Vera Farmiga... Marchesa is always a hit on the carpet, but not this time. Too many red/rose ruffles, the lipstick, the hair.. the whole outfit made her look 10 years older. Not her best. But I would like to grab a beer with this chick. We'll talk about Clooney, Leo (her lover in the Departed). This is one lucky bitch.

Sarah Jessica Parker... Horrible dress, horrible bird's nest bun (how much hair was in that thing?), but she is fantastic. She could wear a paper bag and own it. This was not her best SJP look. Leave the craziness to Carrie Bradshaw. Btw, how OLD does Ferris Beuller look? My god...

Middle of the Road: Some looks, I wasn't crazy about, but didn't hate...

Anna Kendrick looked nice in a pretty blush dress that made her look a good 15 years older. Be 24.

Elizabeth Banks... gorgeous dress, amazing make-up... wrong girl wearing it all. Banks is way too fair-skinned and blonde for this. Olivia Wilde needed to swoop this up when she had the chance. This was her dress. Love Banks though.

Double Take: Notice that Jennifer Lopez & Amanda Seyfried had very similar Armani Prive' dresses... same material, same color, slightly different style. Seyfried seemed way too pale for this dress, have to say it looked better on J. Lo.

Cutest Couple of the Night and maybe ever in Hollywood.... Jeff Bridges and his wife, who I thought was a classic beauty. A marriage of 34 years in Hollywood? Cute. Super f'ing cute.

Sidenotes:

James Cameron looked like such a douche with that nasty floppy hair. He and his wife just look like a nasty, dirty couple. Like they do dirty things. She needs some hair-dye and a box of cookies. I know it took him over 4 years to make "Avatar", but it would've been nice for them to shower within that time, get a haircut. It's hard for me to say one negative thing related to "Titanic", but his affair with this woman (remember she played the grand-daughter of the old Rose Dewitt Bukater) always creeped me out. Then married to Linda Hamilton, I always wished she kicked her ass with her post T2 bod. These guys are gross. We'll see them in another 5 years when A2 comes out.

I love you Kathryn Bigelow, but I'm sorry that dress was a little Macy's/David's Bridal for me. It's your time to show your ex-husband (James Cameron) how amazing you are, step it up a tad. Call Versace, Call Marchesa. I'm sure designers were dying to dress you. She is one tall, tall lady.

I want to see "The Bounty Hunter" with Jenny and Gerry. Sadly, it's probably not very good, and it's not a good sign when I almost published this post calling the movie "The Back-Up Plan". Oops, wrong flick. Also, they should just BE a couple just because it's so fun to say "Jenny & Gerry". "Gerry and Jen are coming over for dinner and drinks tonight... ". See? It works.

I have a crush on Tyler Perry. I hang on every word he says.

I'm a little excited for the 10 minute Lady Gaga & Beyonce "Telephone" video on E!. Why wouldn't I be?

I love Sigourney Weaver. I just want to call her "my friend Sigourney". I'm obsessed with her name. I love her voice. It intrigues me, yet scares me. I just want to say things like, "Hey Sigourney, how's it going?" or "My friend Sigourney is going to mee us out. Is that cool?" And as I continued to watch her throughout the night, I gave her the nickname "Sig". Sig is the best. Think I need to rent me some Alien flicks... there could be a serious girl crush brewing on Ellen Ripley.

Gabourey Sidibe is adorable and I hope this isn't the last we've seen of her. Just a joy to watch on the red carpet modeling her dress telling Seacrest "if this dress was porn, this is the money shot". Hope she stays around.

Mariah Carey... Ah Mariah. She is the worst. And the best. Everything she does is like this big "moment". How does Nick Cannon do it?

Is it me or are we all sick of hearing about "Elisabetta", Clooney's girl? Am I jealous? Maybe.

I love that as soon as Anna Kendrick walks away, Ryan Seacrest Monique that she's a lock to win the best supporting actress. I love Monique... Although her appearance on Barbara Walters was a tad disturbing, admitting to having an open marriage and not having the time to shave her legs. Sorry, I don't get it. Keep your man by your side and wax, it makes for a happier life.

Every time I see Rachel McAdams and Amanda Seyfriend (who both starred in "Mean Girls"), I always think of how they basically took over Lindsay Lohan's career. That's what Lindsay was supposed to be doing, walking the red carpet. Not spending it in rehab. Kind of throws me back to Clueless and how Brittany Murphy started to have the career Alicia Silverstone was supposed to have. Sad.

The show Begins....

Wait. Is this the Emmy's? Is that Neil Patrick Harris again? Yes, yes it is... And Barney Stinson is Legend... wait for it.. dary. What up. I'm always up for a good NPH appearance, it was a bit random though.

The Hosts:

Steve Martin & Alec Baldwin might be the best hosts this show has had in many many years. Sorry Billy. Sorry Whoopi. Sorry.. gulp... Ellen. I loved them in "It's Complicated" and more and more scripts need to come their way. It was one-liner after one-liner. They picked on everyone. No one was safe. Streep, Bullock, Damon, Helen Mirren, Even Clooney played along. My favorite line in the opening sequence was Steve Martin giving Meryl Streep a hard time, "she holds the record for most nominations by an actress, or as I like think of it...most losses". I loved the skit when they shared the bed, and when they hanging out in their snugggies. It was zinger after zinger. I think there were mixed reactions to these 2, but for me... It was no question, I was entertained. They made it easy to watch, simple comedy. Bring these guys back next year.

Round 2 on embarrasing moments in the show: Alec & Steve mentioning out loud that Kathryn Bigelow & James Cameron, who were both nominated for Best Director, were married and now competing for the Oscar hardware. And they are sitting right next to each other. We know they were married. Don't say it out loud.... a little awkward, no?

Best Supporting Actor:

Nominees: Matt Damon (Invictus), Woody Harrelson (The Messenger), Christopher Plummer (The Last Station), Stanley Tucci (The Lovely Bones), Christoph Waltz (Inglorious Bastards)

Winner: Christoph Waltz

This was a lock, no surprise here. Think I need to see "The Messenger" though with Woody.

Best Supporting Actress:

Nominees: Penelope Cruz (Nine), Monique (Precious), Verga Farmiga (Up in the Air), Anna Kendrick (Up in the Air), Maggie Gyllenhaal (Crazy Heart)

Winner: Monique Another sure thing. You know she was loving that walk up to the stage, and after her interview with Babs, you know she was kissing her husband and saying "Baby, you can sleep with whoever you want to tonight. I'm sleeping with Oscar". Great win for Monique.

Best Actor

Nominees: Jeff Bridges (Crazy Heart), Morgan Freeman (Invictus), George Clooney (Up in the Air), Jeremy Renner (The Hurt Locker), Colin Firth (A Single Man)

Winner: Jeff Bridges

I'm not a huge Jeff Bridges fan, but I know he's talented and this was a well deserved win (Crazy Heart seems like "The Wrestler" with a guitar to me). I think he just scares me in some of his performances. Ever see "The Vanishing" with him, Kiefer, and Sandra Bullock? I was out after that movie, so creepy. I loved his speech and his tribute to his parents. And after six nominations over the last 30 years, it was nice to see him finally honored by the academy for his work. I mean, he is the dude....

Best Actress

Nominees: Meryl Streep (Julie & Julia), Sandra Bullock (The Blind Side), Gabourey Sidibe (Precious), Carey Mulligan (An Education), Helen Mirren (The Last Station)

Winner: Sandra Bullock

Sandy's win... the best of the night. I thought Monique could deliver the speeches, but wow...no one really does it quite like Sandra Bullock. She is the every woman. Men want to date, women want to be her friend....a rare quality to find in any kind of Hollywood talent. She's honest and real, and I adore her way of using humor even in the most emotional times. It was a truly deserving win, but the award represents more than just her performance in "The Blind Side". It's for every time she made us ladies laugh in her romantic comedies, whether it was "The Proposal", "Two Weeks Notice", "While You Were Sleeping". But she also entertained us in more thrilling and serious turns as the driver with a bomb on the bus in "Speed", as Harper Lee in "Infamous" and a racist housewife in "Crash". A truly derserved statue for an already fantastic career. Girl crush brewed.

Best Director... Could there be a bigger moment for women in Hollywood than The Hurt Locker's Kathryn Bigelow winning Best Director? And beating your ex-husband no less?! James will be fine, he has his billions of dollars, and with an Oscar trophy at home.

Best Picture... There were too many nominees to list them all, so I won't but "The Hurt Locker" deserved every award it received. Six Oscars for this film. If you haven't seen it, I'm not sure what you are waiting for. Phenomenal flick.

Show Sidenotes:

New addition to the Oscars this year.. showing montages of their performances over a straight 20 second clip. Not a fan of change.

Can't we have an awards show when some of them don't speak!? Seriously, some of these speeches...

I can't even fathom working my whole life in hopes of winning an Academy Award, you finally win and some broad steals your thunder getting to the Oscar? They turn the mic on you after 15 seconds? I would freak.

I love that right after this couple got kicked off the stage after just seconds, Geoffrey Fletcher (who won for the Best Adapted Screenplay) said "I don't know what to say...". I mean...really? I quickly said from my couch, "well you better say it FAST". These people should be practicing in their bedroom, on their drive to and from work, once they find out they are nominated. They have at least 6 weeks to come up with a 15 second speech. How about, "I'd like to thank everybody." Keep it simple. You'd like to thank your family, the cast and the crew. Done. Next...

Where was Farrah Fawcett in the In Memoriam segment.. MJ was in, what about Farrah?

Ben Stiller presenting as an Avatar was one of the funniest moments in the show. He's rumored to be a bit of a dick. I have a hard time accepting that one.

Kristen Stewart is f'ing awkward. She looked like an impostor in that sea of phenomenal talent. She can't get through 15 seconds of a intro without fidgeting like she's uncomfortable being there, too cool to be there. So thankless.

Matchmaker Alert: Jake Gyllenhaal and Rachel McAdams?? These two presented together and I think they would make an adorable couple. Reese Who? Ryan Gosling.. What? These guys need to get together, do it, and make a cute baby. It's a perfect match, both are the kind of people who seem to want to settle down. They'll be on their first date and she'll have a baby bump in just months. You heard it here first. She's the perfect rebound for Jake. Now if she can just get over Ryan...

The chick who won for costume design is an a-hole. Who says "I already have 2 of these. I want to be greedy."?I think I saw some guy in the audience start to say "wow"... now, I'm not sure who he was or what he was going to say, but I think it was something like "wow.. what an A-hole".

I know most people might not be fans of the dancing sequence to the original scores of the films, but I loved this and wanted more. I'd so much rather see this than the individual song performances, but I have a little place in my heart for these dancers. Many of them are former contestants of my favorite dance show "So You Think You Can Dance" - such amazing young talented dancers and choreographers. If you watch this show, you will know these names: Travis Wall, Legacy, Kayla Radomski, Kathryn McCormick. I'm glad that the Oscars chose to showcase this talent. A new season returns in the summer... it's a MUST-WATCH. You will appreciate dance like you never did before.

Most uncomfortable moment in the show?? Um, were Lauren Bacall and the other guy supposed to come up on stage when they received their lifetime achievement awards?? I found it odd that they would just stand up and everyone turned to give them a standing ovation, yet they panned to the empty stage. That moment couldn't have been over sooner for me.

Finally, a politics free Awards show. Maybe it's due to the Tim Robbins-Susan Sarandon break-up.

Well, Awards season is officially wrapped and my first official awards blog is complete. So what now?! Hoops season is here, thank God. But as for awards, I'll see you in September for the EMMY's...